Here
by Kuro49
Summary: KomuiAllen. I will always be here if you want someone to talk to. A broken heart hurts more than anything. But how come he couldn’t cry despite the pain? Allen seeks comfort but he wasn’t him and he can never be him.


KA… not KandaAllen but a **KomuiAllen**, it's just light nothing hardcore at all. I just felt that I have been ignoring Allen for a while in my writing, and then I had a sudden urge of writing something that contained Komui and so here it is! Rather short… but well I don't own anything! May seem a little OCC too…

XXX

**Here**

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I opened the door to his office with a light nudge; it swung open slowly without a sound. I looked at him, he was staring down at his paper; I don't think he noticed me leaning against the frame of his door. He was busy scribbling his signature on to the printed piece of document.

He looked up lightly and raised a hand to rub at his eyes; he took his eyeglasses off and tossed it carelessly on to his table. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he took a deep breath.

He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes.

At first I didn't want to annoy him with another one of my problem but every time a problem comes up I always remember when he first said that to me.

"_I will always be here if you want someone to talk to."_

"Komui…" I lightly called out to him.

He opened his eyes and looked towards the door, he saw me and his lips curled into a kind smile. "Hey Allen, come in here its cold in the science department."

I numbly nodded and walked into his office, quietly closing his door, afraid I may wake up Riba and the others outside.

"What's wrong?" He asked, worry was laced in his voice. "It's already three in the morning." He pointed to a clock on his desk as I stepped over the loose papers that littered the floor and got to his desk.

"Nothing…" I shook my head with a smile on my lips. "It's nothing really."

He just gave me a look; I knew that he didn't believe me. But it was only right after all, I wasn't alright, nothing was alright. But looking at him, I just couldn't, I didn't want him to be even more stress, he was tired enough. He had enough responsibilities to tend to.

"Allen, if it's nothing, you wouldn't be here." He pointed out with a stern look as he put his glasses back on. He gestured for me to come near and I did. Walking around his desk I stood right next to him.

"Want to tell me?" He asked me gently as he placed a hand on my waist and pulled me into his lap. I wrapped both my legs around his waist and just sat there staring at him. I brushed a strand of black hair from his face and tucked it behind his ear.

"Lend me a shoulder." I quietly commanded him.

He complies with my request and didn't ask me anything else. He knows I will tell him when I want to, but now I didn't want to talk at all.

I didn't cry I merely just leaned my head into the crook of his neck. The ends of his hair landed on my cheeks. I breathed in his scent, he smelled of books and papers.

I think my eyes were glassy but my tears didn't fall, none of it did. I wasn't sure if it was a mechanism of self-defense or what, but I couldn't cry. I just couldn't cry.

I just leaned my head and rested on his shoulder. His hand lay on my back and rubbed circles as a gesture of comfort while his other hand firmly gripped my waist, holding me in place.

"Did he break your heart?" He murmured really quietly.

"Yes." I wasn't all that surprised that he knew, he could always tell. Or maybe it was just the rumors that were flying around the Order, words always get around fast. But he knew, since the second that I step into his office. He knew it all along, but I didn't mind, it was better than telling him.

I realized that my hands had tightened on his shirt, crumbling the material underneath my grip.

"Are you crying?" He asked another question.

"No." And I really wasn't, my cheeks were still dry although my eyes were still as glassy as ever.

"Do you want to cry?" He looked at me with a kind smile on his face, I knew he cared about me; he cared about me a lot in fact. Or else he wouldn't be comforting me now.

"Would it help ease the pain?" I asked him back, I wasn't certain about anything but as long as it helps eased the pain in my chest than I was fine.

"I don't know." He answered me truthfully, I knew he wouldn't lie. But sometimes a lie makes it all seem better.

"Then I don't know either." I replied, I wasn't sure about anything, I just wished that everything would be over and I never have to think again.

He gave a light sigh and patted my head. I didn't know what to say so I just laid my head down on to his shoulder and took a deep breath of his scent. I think it calms me down.

"Can you give me a kiss?" I asked him, I had the urge to just feel someone else's lips on mine's. Maybe it was just the fact that I lost my most loved and that I was seeking some comfort in someone else. Either way it didn't matter, I just want some one's lips on mine's.

He looked at me for a second before replying. "Why?"

"Nothing." I answered him. "I just want a kiss."

He then complied to my request again and gently laid his lips on mine's. He was so gentle in every single aspect of his life. Everything about him was gentle, it some how annoyed me. I reached up and pulled at his hair, a little harder then necessary. He gasped in slight pain and I slipped my tongue into his mouth.

I pushed my body against his; I could feel his body reacting with mine's. His hands came to hold me at the waist, pulling me just a little closer, and holding on to me just a little tighter than needed. My tongue came in contact with his, I could hear him gave a light moan at the action.

"Mmm…" I murmured into his mouth, and just as I pulled back to take a breath he didn't look so gentle anymore, he reminded me of _him_, all mused up and careless, always lost in the moment.

And then I remembered again, he wasn't _him_.

He was never _him_.

And he could never be _him_.

I fell silent as I looked at him, the image of the man in front of me twirled in my mind. Over and over again, I thought about him. I parted my lips and begin. "Komui—"

But he cut me off and said. "I am not him."

A sad sort of smile crawled on to my lips and then I replied.

"I know."

XXX Kuro (I know it's weird… but review?)


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